The (unintended) theme of this year seems to be safety. It’s showing up for me in a variety of ways, and I’m doing my best to stay present and wide awake for the lessons.
Whether it’s personal experience, work with clients, soldiers I assess at drill, or conversations with friends, it’s been proven time and time again that feeling safe is a non-negotiable prerequisite for any healing to occur.
If we’re in a job, relationship, or living situation that causes us to feel threatened in any way (physically, emotionally, spiritually) then we’re automatically in “fight or flight” mode. At this point all of our body’s resources are mobilized towards survival- leaving very little room for anything else.
More often than not, it doesn’t matter what supplements we take, how many days a week we’re at the gym, or even how stringently we’re adhering to our spiritual practices- if our adrenaline and cortisol are through the roof the rest of the time, it is unlikely we will achieve true healing.
Perhaps we will find temporary relief (sometimes due to the “white knuckle” approach), but unfortunately this is rarely sustainable.
As a therapist, I often work with those healing from trauma (aren’t we all in some way, at any given time??). I feel it is unreasonable to expect people to journal or meditate if their nervous system is totally shot, and actually believe putting pressure on them to do so could result in retraumatization and a strong aversion to these modalities in the future.
Not to say these can’t be powerful tools in someone’s healing journey, but they need to be approached with great care and acknowledgement that every individual is the authority on their own body.
It’s up to each of us to tune in and discern what feels true for our own self. It is not up to anyone else to determine what our personal work is, or to interpret what messages are being revealed.
We aren’t doing anyone any favors by ignoring our body’s, heart’s, and mind’s cries for help (expressing themselves in the only way they know how). To do so only further perpetuates the stigma and keeps us in an isolation/shame spiral.
Here’s to hoping you reach out, up, or inward today and find whatever it is you need to live your best life.
We’re all in this together ❤🙏
Photo: Dallas, TX October 2017
Anatomy of an Awakening 