“Health” “care”

As much as I’d like to shy away from this topic, I feel called to speak about my experience- and that of countless others who have either not gotten the assistance they need, or worse, saw a decline in health as a result of involvement with the US healthcare system.

I spent over 10 years working in the in the medical field in some capacity. I was a Hospice Social Worker for 4 years, then direct commissioned into the Army and worked as a Behavioral Health Officer in a medical unit for approximately 7 years.

Since 2017 Ive been in private practice for mental health therapy where I assist individuals in healing from trauma and regularly receive referrals from doctor’s offices and mental health facilities.

Over the course of my career I’ve heard numerous stories of trauma, gaslighting, and general mistreatment at the hands of the system and those working within it. I’d like to start by giving a few examples of trauma that can occur in medical settings.

The following come to mind:

• Inappropriate touch by a medical professional.

• Being dismissed or invalidated when expressing concerns.

• Having to make a decision without all the information available to you- or realizing later information was withheld.

• Being asked questions that are not pertinent to the presenting concerns (sexuality, political or religious views, etc).

• Being rushed into making decisions or having procedures.

• Realizing an invasive procedure was not necessary or warranted.

• Nonconsensual exams or interventions. This happens all the time, but especially during the most vulnerable life events, such as during labor/delivery or when End of Life decisions are being made.

It is a profit-driven system. The medical facilities get paid according to how many procedures, tests, prescriptions, etc are utilized. It all comes down to the billing code.

Thinking the system as a whole cares about individuals and is actually designed for health (when it clearly profits from illness) is a childlike fantasy that may have stemmed from enduring abuse and having to convert it in our minds (Stockholm Syndrome or a trauma bond).

This is a survival tactic we employ when we truly believe we cannot leave- and thank God for it.

No judgement, we’ve probably all done this. ..but unlike childhood, we can leave. We choose what we participate in, and where we put our physical bodies.

Anyone that’s worked in the medical field for any length of time has seen or participated in things that should never have occurred, or been encouraged to look the other way instead of reporting ethical issues and misconduct.

This can look like:

• Families being coerced into discontinuing aggressive treatment and admitting the patient to palliative care before being given a fair chance to recover.

• Conflicts of interests with payer sources and pharmaceutical companies.

• Pelvic exams performed on women that were unconscious. The statistics are alarming here, but even one is too many.

• Parents being threatened with a call to Child Protective Services when they ask questions about vaccinations- meanwhile many physicians are administering these without reading the package inserts or knowing the ingredients.

• Parents of vaccine injured children being and dismissed when they seek help- knowing that they had a healthy and happy child that was meeting developmental milestones prior to the “Well Baby” visit.

• Parents of a child that died of SIDS 24-48 hours after receiving immunizations being gaslit when they so much as insinuate there may be a connection.

This happens every day because of power differentials, fear of losing a job, not wanting to rock the boat, etc.

Medical error is the 3rd leading cause of death in the US. I’m not saying this to criticize hard working and compassionate providers who work within the system (many of which are my friends).

I am saying this to illustrate that mistakes can be made, and that just because someone has been deemed the “expert” does not mean they are all-knowing or infallible. The healthy practitioners would agree.

Just a reminder: medical professionals have no authority over you. Let them document AMA (“against medical advice”) in your chart if they want. Its irrelevant outside of their electronic medical record- and you’re an adult, not a misbehaving child.

It’s a self-important system. It’s only relevant to itself and within itself.

You have a right to seek care any kind of care that feels helpful to you.

You have the right to discontinue a treatment at anytime (although I recommend doing it gradually and safely).

You have the right to not seek any treatment at all.

Know your rights and advocate for yourselves and your children. Get a second opinion if needed- or say you will take time to research it, then reengage if you decide to proceed.

Any ethical medical practitioner should be glad to hear you are taking steps to ensure the treatment is right for you. They are not threatened by you researching on your own. They encourage asking questions- and hopefully implementing lifestyle changes (if possible) to prevent medications and prescriptions altogether.

Unfortunately many I’ve run across exhibit what I call “medical narcissism” or “healer ego,” which is an attitude of “I know best,” and that’s where it all goes wrong.

You are the expert on you and your body, and frankly I find it weird and unsettling when people overcare about my choices. A healthy person understands the boundaries and stays “in their lane.”

People that have done their own healing work have no need to control others, and are unable to be bought by external power systems that have positioned themselves as the authority.

Reminding yourself of the information in this post and practicing a few key phrases prior to your appointment is especially important for those prone to freeze and fawn trauma behaviors.

Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you’d like assistance in processing any of the above information, or healing from medical trauma.

I’m a licensed therapist in TN, but am offering Wellness Consults for those in other areas.

I can be reached at lindsey@cartercounseling.com.